


How Sherlock Holmes almost gave the Queen a heart attack

by setok4iba1



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Episode: s02e01 A Scandal in Belgravia, Holmes Brothers, Queen of England - Freeform, Sibling Rivalry, a what if, that sheet scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23562694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/setok4iba1/pseuds/setok4iba1
Summary: A Scandal in Belgravia is by far my favorite episode In the BBC Sherlock series. The humor in this episode surpassed all my expectations. But I always wondered what would have happened if John hadn't stepped in to stop the argument between Sherlock and Mycroft at Buckingham palace. This is an idea of how it could have gone. Probably crack.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	How Sherlock Holmes almost gave the Queen a heart attack

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own BBC's Sherlock the title of ownership goes to Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss. 
> 
> First part is from the episode.
> 
> I wrote this quite a long time ago, but had trouble when I attempted to post it on another site and eventually gave up. Just found it again recently and decided to try posting it here.
> 
> Hope you enjoy reading.
> 
> Thoughts in italics

"Mycroft, I don’t do anonymous clients. I'm used to mystery at one end of my cases. Both ends is too much work. Good Morning."

"This is a matter of national importance. Grow up!"

"Get off my sheet"

"Or what!?"

"Or I'll just walk away."

"I'll let you!"

Mycroft had never regretted saying something **so much** , as when he said **that** to his little brother.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------

Sherlock turned to face his brother raising one eye brow as he did so, and looked him right in the eye. It was then that Mycroft realized his mistake. Sherlock wasn't bored anymore because he, himself, had just given his little brother a dare.

"Fine then"

Sherlock announced as he dropped his hold on the sheet letting it fall to litter the floor. Mycroft lost almost all the color in his face and looked about ready to faint.

_What have I done!?_

"Sherlock!"

Said little brother was now grinning like an imp and backing away.

"Sherlock Holmes, get back here this instant and for God's sake put, at least, your trousers on!"

"Catch me if you can, brother dear."

And with that Sherlock turned and ran down the hall, naked as the day he was born. It was probably only a second of shocked silence that passed before Mycroft madly scrambled after his brother.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John in the mean time had just been standing there, with his mouth hanging open, only one thought crossing his mind.

_Oh My God!_

He shook his head trying to speed his thought process up enough to understand what had just occurred.

He knew that his flat mate was often quite childish, and that when Mycroft came around their sibling rivalry seemed to increase that childishness ten fold, but he had never thought that he would see it expounded to the point of Sherlock showing everyone

what the stork saw.

He turned to look at the only other person in the room. The government official was still staring wide eyed at the hallway which the Holmes brothers had just disappeared down, then he turned to look at John, his face saying plainly that he wanted an

explanation for what had just occurred and he wanted it now!

_Bollocks_

Not able to think of anything else to do to help him get out of this situation, John let out a pathetic little laugh while shrugging his shoulders and took off after the duo down the hall.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meanwhile, Mycroft was still chasing after his little brother, glad that his adrenaline was pumping strongly through his veins, because otherwise he wouldn't have been able to keep up with his little brother at all.

As it was he was only catching glimpses of a skinny white tuchus speeding around corners in front of him.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

George Dansburry, was grateful for his security job here at Buckingham Palace. It was well paying, plus it made others think highly of him. It truly was a great job for him. If it just wasn't so bloody boring.

He was one of hundreds of security guards placed all over the Palace to protect royalty and officials alike. And in all honesty within his eight months of working this particular post nothing had, as of yet, actually happened.

So when he was greeted with the sound of rushing footsteps coming his way he was curious as to what could possibly be going on near his droll little post. There was no way to explain the shock and surprise that he felt,

when around the corner nearly crashing into him burst a young man probably somewhere in his twenties who also happened to be naked as a jay bird. The young man managed to spin on the balls of his feet and stop himself from crashing to the floor.

He then smiled at George, gave a little salute and continued running down the hall taking the next right. George was sure that he had never seen anything so ridiculous in his life, and was unlikely to again, until to his astonishment one of the officials who

walked around as if he was in charge, never a hair out of place, and who could never be bothered with an ounce of legwork came running around the corner huffing and puffing as if he had been in The Running of the Bulls, and then proceeded to plow head

long into him knocking them both over.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mycroft was absolutely winded. He had been running around for what seemed like half an hour when in reality had probably only been around nine minutes at the most. He was beginning to loose ground on his brother, and not wanting to know what other

trouble his brother would get into if he lost him. He raced around the next corner only to spectacularly crash into what felt like a wall of muscles. Knowing he could not afford to loose much time he forced himself up and looked at the guard he had collided

with. Newbie, probably hadn't been working here for even a year. Early thirties and in too much shock to speak. Great well at least the man wouldn't be likely to know his name and could probably be easily intimidated in future, if need be.

"Which way did he go?"

"Uh..."

"Which way!?"

"Oh...uh, that way, ‘n around the corner."

"Thank you."

And with a smile that was obviously faked only for the guards benefit, Mycroft tore down the corridor and to the right.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John had been wondering around lost in the maze of corridors and hallways trying to catch a glimpse of either Mycroft or Sherlock. He kept thinking back to the first time he had met Mycroft Holmes, or maybe he should say kidnapped by Mycroft Holmes.

He remembered how Mycroft had said that he "worried about Sherlock constantly", and now wondered if that worry was about Sherlock’s mental and physical health or referring to how badly Sherlock could embarrass his older brother. Either way he should

probably find the brothers before things got worse. After all Sherlock was bound to be in enough trouble as it was, John was sure there was some law against streaking in Buckingham Palace.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sherlock was having a blast. It had been quite a while since he had been able to actually get Mycroft, himself, to physically chase after him. The problem now was the fact that as much fun as getting his brother to chase him was, he really needed to find a

place to hide so that his brother wouldn’t give up due to lack of physical energy, and just send the guards after him. Speaking of guards. Sherlock hadn't seen all that many since he got here. Ah well, easier for me I guess. Now where to hide? Sherlock

decided that the door to the next room coming up looked as good as any and so ran in shutting the door as quietly as possible.

"Well I never...!"

Apparently the room wasn't quite as empty as he had hoped. Sherlock turned around only to come face to face with the Queen of England herself as well as her regimen of well trained body guards…

_Not good?_

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was worse. It was so much worse. John was now being chased by at least a dozen palace guards, and he had yet to see even a glimpse of one of the Holmes brothers.

If something didn't happen soon John didn’t want to think about what tortures were done to suspicious looking people who happened to be caught running around in Buckingham Palace.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mycroft had lost his brother. He couldn't even find a trace of him. He couldn't bear the thought of calling security, what would people say when they found out the man running around in nothing but his birthday suit was his brother.

"My brother is going to be the ruin of me."

He sighed running a hand through his hair. And so he decided that instead of alerting anyone of his brother, “the security breach”, he would start trying doors at random and hopefully find his brother before he, completely, ruined the Holmes family

reputation, or, logic forbid, anyone of importance saw him.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John was beyond the point of being exhausted. He knew it was probably only a matter of minutes before the guards would be able to grab hold of him, so in a last ditch effort he tried putting on a burst of speed and running through a random door. Once

through the door however what he saw stopped him dead in his tracks. Sitting wearing a robe of rich foreign silk was Sherlock, sipping tea, with The Queen of England! In his surprise John had completely forgotten about the guards chasing him and because

of it he didn't stand a chance. Around a dozen or so guards gave an all mighty battle cry and jumped on top of him, trying to bring, what they saw as a threat, down. John, managing to crawl half way out from under the pile of bodies on top of him, only to

see his flat mate turn to the Queen and say calm as you please:

"My lady, may I introduce my Blogger Dr. John Watson."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A few hallways over Mycroft heard the gallant war cry and with terror realized it came from the area where the Queen was likely to be taking her mid-morning tea. Running as fast as his frazzled state would allow, he ran in the direction of the noise.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

John could not believe it! All this time Sherlock had been having tea and cakes while he, had been running around like a lunatic in a labyrinth, dodging guards, and trying to find him! He really wanted to punch something, and a self proclaimed sociopath was

definitely high on his list of things to hit.

"Ah Dr Watson, please do join us for tea won't you?"

Who was an army doctor to say no to the Queen of England?

"Do sit down. Young Mr. Holmes here has been telling me about some of your adventures together. You see I am rather a fan of your blog..."

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mycroft made it to the room where according to the way the door frame was scratched several people had recently tried to enter all at once. Before entering said room he tried to compose (prepare) himself for whatever he might see or have to do. As fate

would have it, it wasn't even close to anything he had expected. It was worse. There sat John and his little brother (Thankfully clothed in a robe this time!) sitting and having tea and cakes with the Queen.

"Ah, Mycroft do come in. You look rather hassled, is everything alright?"

"My Queen I apologize for whatever state you may have seen my little brother in, I can assure you he was not raised that way!"

"Quite alright, Mycroft, quite alright. Young Mr. Holmes here has already explained that he was brought here in quite a rush and without any advanced notice. Quite improper form on our part, wouldn't you agree?"

"Improper form. Yes. Definitely."

_He and I are going to have a long discussion when this is over._

"Now then Mycroft, will you be joining us for tea and cakes?"

"My apologies my Lady, you see my older brother is on a diet at the moment and therefore shouldn't eat any cake at all."

Sherlock announced quite smugly.

"Ah I see such a shame. I even had some red velvet cake here which I had believed to be his favorite. Ah well so is life."

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Fratricide, Mycroft was seriously considering fratricide. After all of the leg work he had just done, not to mention all the embarrassment he had, and will have to, put up with over this incident. AND he wasn't even going to get to eat any of his favorite cake_

_that had been offered to him by the Queen herself!_

_He could probably get away with it too, after all he is, as his dear little brother so liked to put it. The British Government!_

_Oh, but what would Mummy think?_

_Damn._

**Author's Note:**

> I can guess that when some of you read the title you were probably thinking it was the  
> Queen of England herself, who was going to be the one to nearly have a heart attack, 
> 
> Let me explain:  
> In the episode A Scandal in Belgravia when John asks "Sherlock what are we doing here? …Here to see the queen?" and at that moment Mycroft enters to be greeted by his brother saying "oh! Apparently yes" this was the thought that had crossed my mind when I was writing the title. Sorry for any confusion. And I hope you enjoyed the story.


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